Eight Myths (and Facts) about Networking
Contrary to much of the published advice about networking, we believe that your single most important job when meeting people for networking purposes is to make them feel comfortable. Below are just a few of the myths that abound regarding networking as part of a job search.
MYTH #1: Networking is about aggressively asking people to do favors for you during your job search
FACT: Networking is about two professionals building a relationship, getting to know each other and helping each other.
This takes time and simply cannot be accomplished over a single meeting. Consistently helping others is the best way to forge long-term relationships. Offer to help people whenever you can, and respond promptly to requests you receive. Refresh your connections if it’s been a while since your last contact. Forwarding relevant law-related or other articles and information to your contacts is one great way to build rapport and stay in touch.
MYTH #2: The purpose of networking is to get a job
FACT: The primary purpose of networking is not to get a job.
The purpose is to learn about (and from) your networking contact, so you can develop and deepen the relationship. Relationships with members of your network may ultimately lead to a job, but do not go into any meeting or conversation expecting that result. In fact, one of the most important rules of networking is not to ask for a job (or even for a list of any job openings). Your networking partner is well aware that you would welcome information about job openings, and you can assume he will let you know if he has any; however, it is unlikely that he will know of an appropriate specific opening at that moment, and asking for a job (or job listings) may cause your conversation to stall or become awkward. Remember: Your number one goal when networking is to make your networking partner feel comfortable.
MYTH #3: Networking requires going to big events
FACT: Networking is about connecting with people in an authentic way.
Quality is much more important than quantity when making connections. Instead of spending valuable time amassing a huge list of people for your network, devote your energy to strengthening your relationships with those people who could really make a difference in your career.
If you are extroverted and enjoy going to events with lots of people, great – go for it. While you’re there, be strategic, and meet people in your target field so you can schedule one-on-one follow-up coffees or lunches with them after the event. But if you do not enjoy going to big events, feel free to skip them. Instead, arrange one-on-one meetings with connections that you make via your own expanding network.
You have a lot of options when it comes to avenues for networking, including online networking. Virtual chat rooms, discussion boards and LinkedIn groups allow you to network with people in your target industries and obtain helpful information and advice. There is more than one way to network, but whichever way you choose, it should feel comfortable and natural to you.
Do you consider yourself an introvert? In this Knowledge@Wharton podcast, Karen Wickre, author of Taking the Work out of Networking: An Introvert's Guide to Making Connections That Count, talks about how introverts can learn to network effectively (22 minutes). You can also check out this article by Sabrina Hall about online self-promotion.
MYTH #4: Networking involves handing out business cards to lots of people
FACT: It is more important to get business cards than to give them out.
When you get a business card from someone, the ball is in your court; you have the person’s contact information and can follow up with the person whenever and however you think would be most effective. In contrast, if you hand out your business card, you have no idea what will happen to it and, therefore, to the potential relationship.
One more tip about business cards: When somebody hands you a business card, do not just stick it in your purse or pocket. Instead, take a minute to look at the card, make a comment or ask a question about it, and thank the person for giving it to you. Ideally, as soon as you can, write down a few details about the person and your conversation on the back of the card so you can make yourself as memorable as possible when you reach out soon thereafter.
MYTH #5: It is only worth networking with decision-makers who have the power to hire you
FACT: Your best networking comes from your strongest relationships.
People who know you and like you will refer you to others who may be in a position to help you. Your first-degree connections are usually not your target decision-makers, and they may not even be in your field, but they can still help you a lot.
Example #1: People in your personal life (e.g., your hair stylist, doctor, accountant, personal trainer) may well have other clients who work in your target organizations or who do work that you would like to do. These personal contacts of yours can connect you with their potentially helpful clients in a casual, non-threatening way.
Example #2: Suppose that you would like to move in-house to the legal department at ABC Corporation. Your neighbor who works in another department at ABC Corporation may be able to give you information about the company (e.g., its structure, the jargon used, its priorities) and perhaps even about the legal department, which you can use to sound more informed and focused when you speak with other ABC employees and decision-makers. ABC Corporation (like many large companies) might also have an employee referral program, which would result in your resume getting extra attention and a favorable presumption when your neighbor submits it. If your neighbor knows the decision-maker or others in the legal department, that would obviously give you an edge when a position opens up.
MYTH #6: People are either natural networkers or they aren’t
FACT: Networking is a skill that can be learned – by anyone.
Most people are not “born networkers.” It is true that some people tend to strike up conversations with strangers more easily than others, but people who are more introverted often have valuable skills (getting people to talk about themselves, great listening skills, ability to elicit important information, etc.) that can lead to deep, meaningful, quality connections.
Networking also gets easier with practice. A conversation that seems intimidating when you start your job search may feel totally comfortable for you after you have had a chance to practice a couple of these types of conversations. If you’re less than comfortable with networking, start by reaching out to people you know fairly well. Once you’ve gotten a few conversations and meetings under your belt, approaching more remote contacts (or brand new contacts) will become easier.
MYTH #7: It would be an imposition to ask someone to network with me
FACT: Everyone has to look for employment at one point or another during their careers, and the vast majority of lawyers and other professionals whom you will meet have, themselves, gotten jobs (as well as clients) through networking. All professionals today understand that networking is an essential part of both job searching and overall career management.
Most people are more than willing to help you. The key is that you must do your part to make helping easy for them. How? By being clear and specific about what you want (information about an industry, introductions to specific contacts, an opinion on your game plan, etc.) Busy people are much happier to give specifically requested help than to have to come up with ways to assist you themselves.
MYTH #8: Be totally candid when networking
FACT: While you should be sincere, truthful and clear about your goals, remember that your networking contact is a professional contact, not a friend (at least not yet).
You should certainly strive to develop genuine rapport, but remember that your networking meeting is not a therapy session, and it is not the time or place to share all of your anger and frustration about your last job, your former boss, the manner in which you were let go from your job or the job search process.
Remember: People want to help positive people who are in forward motion, and they want to use their own political capital to help people who will make them look good (and who will not call their judgment into question). Connect with your networking partner on multiple levels, but reserve any soul-baring for your friends and family who already know and appreciate you in a larger context.